“Quality Of Life Therapy” by Michael B. Frisch 2006 (www.wiley.com/go/frisch)
Pg. 158-159 Techniques For Managing Anger
“Treat anger like an addiction or compulsive behavior, that is, a behavior that feels good but that is, ultimately, self-defeating in the long term.” “Self-monitoring of Anger defined as behavior based on angry feelings, viewing each as a habit or addiction.”
“According to addiction specialist, Alan Marlatt, as people plan or sculpt their days, they should always provide a balance between “should” and “want” activities. “Should Activities” are things people feel they must do but don’t enjoy. “Want Activities” are things they enjoy doing—they create such a feeling of pleasure or satisfaction that they want to do them. People are at high risk for addictive behavior when “Should Activities” dominate.” (Quality Of Life Therapy, Michael B. Frisch, 2006, pg. 137)
ESTABLISHING (or Cultivating,) “positive addictions”, PLAY HABIT OR ROUTINE Toolbox CD, Pg. 252
List advantages and disadvantages to a commitment to Play activities in general and a specific daily and weekly Play Routine.
For most people, play or recreational activities are essential ways to relax, have fun, forget worries, be creative, learn something new, or improve themselves, others, or their community. These activities can renew and refresh us so that we perform better in our work and relationships. Circle the number next to every activity that you think you might enjoy as a recreational outlet. Do not think about what is best, most practical, or easy to do. Just circle any item that interests you or that you’ve enjoyed in the past. Circle activities in which you get so involved that you lose track of time—these are called flows in QOLT. While harder to get started, active recreational activities such as gardening are usually more satisfying and beneficial than passive activities such as watching television. When you are finished, choose some activities to try and see whether they are satisfying, fun, or pleasurable. Try to follow a Play or Recreation Routine or Leisure Plan in which youregularly—preferably daily even for just 5 minutes—engage in some of these activities in order to improve your overall quality of life. (Note: Many activities not directly associated with couples, families, or friends may be adapted and done with a partner, a family, or a friend(s). Some items are repeated on purpose.)
Mental Health Day or Hour Technique Toolbox CD
This is one of the most powerful and neglected techniques of QOLT. Sometimes we feel so upset or bad that all we want to do is crawl into bed and hide under the covers. At other times, we become so agitated, depressed, or upset that it may be helpful to simply take a few hours or the day off. At times like these, get a babysitter, take off from work, and fill your day with some Inner Abundance activities as you wait to gradually get re-centered and relaxed. Don’t worry, it will happen if you take the time off. Time off is not for wallowing in your sorrows, although an hour or two of crying time is fine to start as you get in touch with all the hurt or pain you feel. Mental Health Days or Hours should not be used to avoid facing problems directly, an action going against the very foundation of QOLT that counsels facing problems and reality honestly and directly. Rather, an occasional Mental Health Day or Hour away from responsibilities is designed to help you regroup so that you can tackle your problems with renewed vigor and sagacity.
A Mental Health Day or Hour is for taking some time off to recharge their batteries, get deeply relaxed, and stay productively busy around the house or wherever you happen to be. This will reduce your arousal level and improve your attitude so that you are ready to tackle your problems with renewed vigor. For the technique to be effective, remind yourself to stay busy doing things that you love. For example, include some quality time and pure fun activities. It can help tremendously to get out of the house or even stay in a local hotel for a day or two with no daily responsibilities. Visit a close friend, go out of town, take a day trip, go to a spa, or attend a retreat of some kind. As a continuation treatment/intervention strategy, this can be done every 3 to 6 months to prevent relapse into unhealthy old habits or an episode of unhappiness.
Mental Health Days/Hours must be used judiciously and sparingly; overdoing this could compromise precious vacation time or even your job. After taking some Mental Health time, take note of what really worked in getting you relaxed, centered, and ready to get back to your life.
Altruism: Cultivate a regular Serving or Helping Routine Pg. 265-269
Helping activities can give a focus and a purpose to people who are going through major life crises and transitions at little or no cost to begin.Acts of helping and service to others may foster a positive perception of others and one's community, an increased sense of cooperation and interdependence with other people, and an awareness of one's good fortune, presumably as a person makes “downward social comparisons,” as in seeing the lot of a homeless person as much worse than their own. Helping often involves socializing, thereby satisfying a basic human need of us “social animals,” which, by itself, may boost one's sense of satisfaction, contentment, and happiness; according to Diener and Seligman (2004) even introverts prefer to have other people around them even if they would rather not have to interact with those people in any great depth.
Helping is an avenue to meaning in life from both secular and spiritual perspectives. Anecdotal evidence supports the view that what helped most is when the helper is doing the helping because it is a core value that the person holds and not merely a way to selfishly boost his or her happiness. To kindle or rekindle a value of helping, one can explore and reinforce the philosophical or spiritual basis of this through homework (reading or studying about others service or helping experiences).
Service has been found to prolong life. Paid staff versus volunteer distinctions are likely meaningless so long as people see the work as really helping others. It may truly be better to give than to receive. Self-consciousness and self-focused attention are also endemic to depression and anxiety problems, making it a relief to focus on helping others, on one’s spiritual community, and on one’s religious practices instead of the self.
Many people however suffer from the Giving Tree Syndrome; they become depressed when overwhelmed by outside responsibilities. The Self-Other Principle suggests that one balance the time he or she devotes to helping other people with time for his or herself or self-caring. Self-caring is not selfishness. It is a realistic understanding that we have some basic physical and psychological needs that have to be met before we can be there for anyone else or do anything else. It can be thought of as self-maintenance.
Try to do 5 acts of Kindness each day. It can be simple like smiling, or being kind when you normally would be rude like when driving.
When cultivating a helping routine it should be associated with things someone values and cares about. For some people helping may include such things as protecting the environment, animals, children, the arts and music, etc. A common occurrence in Helping interventions is a type of volunteer work becomes a second career or hobby, giving people a new focus during their off hours and flow-like distraction from Big Three worries and emotions. Such volunteer positions can turn into paid employment for those who wish to pursue that option as well.
Helping is an effective cure-all for many people with Big Three emotional control problems, as well as clinical levels of depression, anxiety, social phobia, anger, and addiction. One must be careful when adopting the attitude of “I’ll try anything once” or accepting any opportunity to help. If someone has a problem with an addiction it would not be safe to accept an opportunity to serve or help in an environment where he or she would be at risk of relapsing. One must be wise about what he or she will try and accept.
*It is important to note that just be seeing someone serve and help others can be beneficial to observers. So if doing service or helping directly is not a possibility at first, one can simply begin observing others, helping or serving (in movies, radio, etc.) before beginning his or her own helping routine.
Pg. 94-99 Other CASIO Interventions
Strategy 1: Changing Circumstances
Strategy 2: Changing Attitudes
Strategy 3: Changing Goals and Standards
Strategy 4: Changing Priorities or What’s Important
Strategy 5: Boosting Satisfaction in Other Areas
Pg. 106-108 Calculated Risk principle, Check-in with friends principle; Creativity Routine Principle, Curb or ignore desires principle or you can’t have it all principle; Daily Vacation Principle
Pg. 151-152 Lie Detector Questions or Questions-in-Court Technique, Set up a Test Technique, Responsibility Pie Technique, Second Opinion Technique, Feeling Dictionary
Pg. 251-253, 262-263 ESTABLISHING A PLAY HABIT OR ROUTINE
Pg. 264-265 Altruism, Serving
Pg. 267-269 Helping Routines, Pro versus Con Technique, building talents-focusing on strengths
Pg. 202-207 HABIT CONTROL PROGRAM FOR POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE ADDICTIONS
Step One: Building Commitment, Motivation, and Inner Abundance
Step Two: Record TAC
Step Three: Take a New TAC: Planning & Implementing the Habit Change Prog.
Step Four: Stress Management and Problem Solving for Related Problem
Step Five: Relapse Prevention or Maintenance & the Personal Stress Profile
Step Six: Coping with Relapse
Pg. 316-319 Relapse Emergency Checklist
Pg. 320-323 Personal Stress Profile (PSP)
Pg. 324-325 Clinical Example of Relapse Prevention Exercise
Pg. 158-159 Techniques For Managing Anger
“Treat anger like an addiction or compulsive behavior, that is, a behavior that feels good but that is, ultimately, self-defeating in the long term.” “Self-monitoring of Anger defined as behavior based on angry feelings, viewing each as a habit or addiction.”
“According to addiction specialist, Alan Marlatt, as people plan or sculpt their days, they should always provide a balance between “should” and “want” activities. “Should Activities” are things people feel they must do but don’t enjoy. “Want Activities” are things they enjoy doing—they create such a feeling of pleasure or satisfaction that they want to do them. People are at high risk for addictive behavior when “Should Activities” dominate.” (Quality Of Life Therapy, Michael B. Frisch, 2006, pg. 137)
ESTABLISHING (or Cultivating,) “positive addictions”, PLAY HABIT OR ROUTINE Toolbox CD, Pg. 252
List advantages and disadvantages to a commitment to Play activities in general and a specific daily and weekly Play Routine.
For most people, play or recreational activities are essential ways to relax, have fun, forget worries, be creative, learn something new, or improve themselves, others, or their community. These activities can renew and refresh us so that we perform better in our work and relationships. Circle the number next to every activity that you think you might enjoy as a recreational outlet. Do not think about what is best, most practical, or easy to do. Just circle any item that interests you or that you’ve enjoyed in the past. Circle activities in which you get so involved that you lose track of time—these are called flows in QOLT. While harder to get started, active recreational activities such as gardening are usually more satisfying and beneficial than passive activities such as watching television. When you are finished, choose some activities to try and see whether they are satisfying, fun, or pleasurable. Try to follow a Play or Recreation Routine or Leisure Plan in which youregularly—preferably daily even for just 5 minutes—engage in some of these activities in order to improve your overall quality of life. (Note: Many activities not directly associated with couples, families, or friends may be adapted and done with a partner, a family, or a friend(s). Some items are repeated on purpose.)
Mental Health Day or Hour Technique Toolbox CD
This is one of the most powerful and neglected techniques of QOLT. Sometimes we feel so upset or bad that all we want to do is crawl into bed and hide under the covers. At other times, we become so agitated, depressed, or upset that it may be helpful to simply take a few hours or the day off. At times like these, get a babysitter, take off from work, and fill your day with some Inner Abundance activities as you wait to gradually get re-centered and relaxed. Don’t worry, it will happen if you take the time off. Time off is not for wallowing in your sorrows, although an hour or two of crying time is fine to start as you get in touch with all the hurt or pain you feel. Mental Health Days or Hours should not be used to avoid facing problems directly, an action going against the very foundation of QOLT that counsels facing problems and reality honestly and directly. Rather, an occasional Mental Health Day or Hour away from responsibilities is designed to help you regroup so that you can tackle your problems with renewed vigor and sagacity.
A Mental Health Day or Hour is for taking some time off to recharge their batteries, get deeply relaxed, and stay productively busy around the house or wherever you happen to be. This will reduce your arousal level and improve your attitude so that you are ready to tackle your problems with renewed vigor. For the technique to be effective, remind yourself to stay busy doing things that you love. For example, include some quality time and pure fun activities. It can help tremendously to get out of the house or even stay in a local hotel for a day or two with no daily responsibilities. Visit a close friend, go out of town, take a day trip, go to a spa, or attend a retreat of some kind. As a continuation treatment/intervention strategy, this can be done every 3 to 6 months to prevent relapse into unhealthy old habits or an episode of unhappiness.
Mental Health Days/Hours must be used judiciously and sparingly; overdoing this could compromise precious vacation time or even your job. After taking some Mental Health time, take note of what really worked in getting you relaxed, centered, and ready to get back to your life.
Altruism: Cultivate a regular Serving or Helping Routine Pg. 265-269
Helping activities can give a focus and a purpose to people who are going through major life crises and transitions at little or no cost to begin.Acts of helping and service to others may foster a positive perception of others and one's community, an increased sense of cooperation and interdependence with other people, and an awareness of one's good fortune, presumably as a person makes “downward social comparisons,” as in seeing the lot of a homeless person as much worse than their own. Helping often involves socializing, thereby satisfying a basic human need of us “social animals,” which, by itself, may boost one's sense of satisfaction, contentment, and happiness; according to Diener and Seligman (2004) even introverts prefer to have other people around them even if they would rather not have to interact with those people in any great depth.
Helping is an avenue to meaning in life from both secular and spiritual perspectives. Anecdotal evidence supports the view that what helped most is when the helper is doing the helping because it is a core value that the person holds and not merely a way to selfishly boost his or her happiness. To kindle or rekindle a value of helping, one can explore and reinforce the philosophical or spiritual basis of this through homework (reading or studying about others service or helping experiences).
Service has been found to prolong life. Paid staff versus volunteer distinctions are likely meaningless so long as people see the work as really helping others. It may truly be better to give than to receive. Self-consciousness and self-focused attention are also endemic to depression and anxiety problems, making it a relief to focus on helping others, on one’s spiritual community, and on one’s religious practices instead of the self.
Many people however suffer from the Giving Tree Syndrome; they become depressed when overwhelmed by outside responsibilities. The Self-Other Principle suggests that one balance the time he or she devotes to helping other people with time for his or herself or self-caring. Self-caring is not selfishness. It is a realistic understanding that we have some basic physical and psychological needs that have to be met before we can be there for anyone else or do anything else. It can be thought of as self-maintenance.
Try to do 5 acts of Kindness each day. It can be simple like smiling, or being kind when you normally would be rude like when driving.
When cultivating a helping routine it should be associated with things someone values and cares about. For some people helping may include such things as protecting the environment, animals, children, the arts and music, etc. A common occurrence in Helping interventions is a type of volunteer work becomes a second career or hobby, giving people a new focus during their off hours and flow-like distraction from Big Three worries and emotions. Such volunteer positions can turn into paid employment for those who wish to pursue that option as well.
Helping is an effective cure-all for many people with Big Three emotional control problems, as well as clinical levels of depression, anxiety, social phobia, anger, and addiction. One must be careful when adopting the attitude of “I’ll try anything once” or accepting any opportunity to help. If someone has a problem with an addiction it would not be safe to accept an opportunity to serve or help in an environment where he or she would be at risk of relapsing. One must be wise about what he or she will try and accept.
*It is important to note that just be seeing someone serve and help others can be beneficial to observers. So if doing service or helping directly is not a possibility at first, one can simply begin observing others, helping or serving (in movies, radio, etc.) before beginning his or her own helping routine.
Pg. 94-99 Other CASIO Interventions
Strategy 1: Changing Circumstances
Strategy 2: Changing Attitudes
Strategy 3: Changing Goals and Standards
Strategy 4: Changing Priorities or What’s Important
Strategy 5: Boosting Satisfaction in Other Areas
Pg. 106-108 Calculated Risk principle, Check-in with friends principle; Creativity Routine Principle, Curb or ignore desires principle or you can’t have it all principle; Daily Vacation Principle
Pg. 151-152 Lie Detector Questions or Questions-in-Court Technique, Set up a Test Technique, Responsibility Pie Technique, Second Opinion Technique, Feeling Dictionary
Pg. 251-253, 262-263 ESTABLISHING A PLAY HABIT OR ROUTINE
Pg. 264-265 Altruism, Serving
Pg. 267-269 Helping Routines, Pro versus Con Technique, building talents-focusing on strengths
Pg. 202-207 HABIT CONTROL PROGRAM FOR POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE ADDICTIONS
Step One: Building Commitment, Motivation, and Inner Abundance
Step Two: Record TAC
Step Three: Take a New TAC: Planning & Implementing the Habit Change Prog.
Step Four: Stress Management and Problem Solving for Related Problem
Step Five: Relapse Prevention or Maintenance & the Personal Stress Profile
Step Six: Coping with Relapse
Pg. 316-319 Relapse Emergency Checklist
Pg. 320-323 Personal Stress Profile (PSP)
Pg. 324-325 Clinical Example of Relapse Prevention Exercise
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